Thursday, May 17, 2007

331 - Googles

Weasel Lawn Ornaments

1. Weasel Lawn Ornaments
Another edition of favorite google searches that have brought websurfers to this site.
Are there any weasel lawn ornaments? If there are, why would anyone want to put one in his yard.

I Want To Buy A Son of Svengoolie Shirt

2. I Want To Buy A Son of Svengoolie Shirt
Send $20 in cashier's check or money order made out to WCIU-TV along with your name, size preference (L, XL, 2XL) address, and a daytime phone number to:
Svengoolie T-SHIRT c/o WCIU 26 N. Halsted
Chicago, IL 60661

Masterbating Ponies

3. Masterbating Ponies
Since I started this site, I've been trying to slip in subtle porn references with the hope to bring in people searching for some decent self-gratification aids. Unfortunately it hasn't really worked except in this one instance, and this guy is some kind of perverted freak.

Wind Blows Up Women's Skirts

4. Wind Blows Up Women's Skirts
This guy's probably a bit of a pervert too. I'm afraid he was disappointed, however. I don't remember ever linking to any upskirt photos or videos.

Recipe for Making Undetectable Poison

5. Recipe for Making Undetectable Poison
If you have ever done this particular google search, I just want to recommend destroying your hard-drive before murdering your significant other. Actually, to be safe, only do this search from the library or some other public place where the internet traffic cannot be traced back to you.

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3 comments:

arch stanton said...

do people really search for things like, "i want to buy a son of svengoolie shirt"?
are these people just out of a coma and finding a search engine for the first time?
what the hell?
maybe i've been using google incorrectly...

arch stanton said...

here's a funny comic about google searches:
http://xkcd.com/c155.html

Christopher said...

A lot of people search for whole sentences. My dad for instance. I think that's the whole point of the Ask Jeeves search engine which I imagine just automatically eliminates unneeded words like "the" and "and" before searching.

P.S. In the last 2 days at least 6 people have come here looking for "undetectable poison"